Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize