But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
We just shotgunned beers for America
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
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