going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
