Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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