Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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