Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
