i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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