You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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