There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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