Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
