i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Dick very happy bro
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