Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i think i have herpe
just one?
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize
