Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
