Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
