I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
