when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
