The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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