On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
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