PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize