she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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