Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
