you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize