oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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