Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
