So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
