Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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