Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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