Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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