No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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