do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize