i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
