why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
