he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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