fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
