The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
