My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Randomize
