A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
