Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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