do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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