So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
