i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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