i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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