the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
