Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
