Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize