Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
