I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
