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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I didn't notice because vodka
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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