Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Dear god my vagina.
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