I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
