Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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